Resolution time... again?!??!?
The main thing that I don't understand with the new year is how people always make new year's resolutions. To me it is all a bunch of bull crap, because it's just a way of people making excuses to procrastinate in improving their lives. A mate of mine asked me yesterday, what my new year's resolution would be for this year. I couldn't be bothered to argue with him about how I think resolutions are nonsense, so after thinking about it a bit, I said, "My new year's resolution would be to get an Aston Martin DB9 and drive from here to my hometown in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia".
Come on, think about it. It's a peach of a car. It's agonisingly stunning, it's got pedigree, it's got a huge V12 inside, and most importantly, it's a GT. Which means, it's designed to go long distances. And Norwich to Kuala Lumpur is long distance. I know the DB9's downfall is it's flappy pedal gear shifting and transmission, but I'm not thrashing it around a track, am I? I'd be driving it calmly and smoothly, and the DB9 would be perfect for that.
The other thing is the route. Thankfully, Asia and Europe are connected with each other, and the UK is connected with Europe through the Channel Tunnel. So far so good. From the UK, I'd be going through France, Germany, the Chech Republic, Poland, Belarus and Ukraine before getting into Asia. With all the fucked up things happening in the Middle East, and also the small obstacle of the Himalayas, I think I'd take a longer route through China. So from Ukraine, I'll continue through Russia, and Kazakhstan into China. From there, I'll drive this side of the Mekong River, into Burma, Thailand and finally Malaysia. Home sweet home.
OK, realistically, It's not as simple as that. Firstly, the distance. As the crow flies, the distance is about 10,500 km. Driving on the surface, I think it would be safe to assume to be twice that number, about 20,000 km. Then theres the huge assumption (especially in Western China where it's just a huge dessert) that there would be roads at acceptable standards for me to drive on. Then there's reliability issues. Come on, how good the engineering would be, the DB9 is still considered a super car, and we all know that supercars have reliabilities of a 15 year old lorry. Oh, and let's not forget the smallish fact of where I'm gonna get £110,000 to buy the car. I can't even afford to pay off my debts, and that's only less than 2% of that.Back to the conversation I was having with a mate of mine, he said his resolution would be to quit smoking and get married to his fiance. I guess I should set driving the DB9 back home as my resolution for, say 2020. For this year, I guess I'll just have to lose wight and pay off my debts. Woohoo. Happy new year.